Welcome to my new feature – Motivational Monday!! Each Monday I will post a video that resonates with me and a few words about what I have discovered now that I am committed to living the life of my dreams.

I have spent a long time – years upon years UPON YEARS – being so very unhappy in my marriage, with myself and with my life and yet I seemed unable to move forward. If you read anything by me, you know that I 100% reject the idea of co-dependency or enabler or any other (bull shit) label that places blame on the alcoholic’s wife. I didn’t stay where I was because I subconsciously needed it or secretly wanted my husband to keep drinking.

I stayed where I was because the process of change – no matter what your situation – is a complicated, convuluted process. And part of the complication, I believe, lies in the fact that we often try to motivate ourselves with the idea of getting out of our misery. We think the need to move away from a toxic husband or the desire to not live in chaos and dysfunction should motivate us to change. But the fact is moving AWAY from the bad or negative is a very poor catalyst for change.

What really helps create the movement for change in the human psyche?

Moving TOWARD the positive. Don’t think about climbing out of the mud: think about running to the sunshine. The truth is eventually all obstacles – be it an alcoholic husband or dysfunctional parents or mental illness or chronic illness or injury…the list goes on and on. There is no shortage of obstacles life can toss at us. But the truth is eventully the obstacle is Of. No. Consequence. What is of consequence is your mind set.

And when your mind is set on Creating a brilliant new life for yourself, rather than simply getting away from the unhappy life you’re living, you’ll know you are ready to bring great change to your life and within yourself.