I know I am now fully prepared to leave.
I know I have accepted unequivocally that that my marriage is over.
I know I am committed completely to getting out.
And yet…
I don’t know how to make it not hurt when my husband walks in the door from work and doesn’t acknowledg me. Say hello or give me a kiss.
I don’t know how not to feel a sting of pain when he goes to bed with out saying good night.
I don’t know how to not notice every morning when he walks out the door without giving me a good-bye kiss.
I’ve learned to stop expecting anything from him.
I really have.
I just don’t know how to learn to stop making it hurt.
I know this feeling and have let it exist far too long. I am not sure why it is so hard for me to take the final step…I think we have to accept the pain of leaving a difficult situation in order to have the opportunity for what we deserve. If we don’t leave, nothing will change and if we do leave, we at least then have the space to create something healthier and happier for ourselves. We need to leave, I need to leave…and I hear myself in your posts. Time keeps moving forward and I have been unhappy for well over 10 years…another year does not need to pass.
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