For so long, I had hope and strength and a fire in my belly.
Some way, some how I was going to slay this dragon called alcoholism.
Specifically my husband’s alcoholism that is.
I wasn’t going to succumb to the “second hand” anger and fury that was building in me.
For so long I had that belief.
So long.
And yet it seems like overnight it has been lost.
Overnight I feel no more like I can.
Is this my life?
My destiny?
To forever live in the hostile shadows of an alcholic husband?
I don’t want it to be.
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It doesn’t have to be. When you wake up ask yourself – will I move towards health or will I move towards sickness. Do something, anything to make your day better for you. Go for a walk, have lunch with a friend, and consider finding the right counselor for you. After 1 month of counseling I am feeling better … We need to put our own needs first and to realize what love is. Love is not putting a drug above your life partner, it includes healthy communication and caring… Not avoidance and pushing away your partner in life because your alcoholic routines are your priority.
Try harder to take care of you and see what is real & true.
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Hang in their sister friend!!!
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I broke in Jan. Pulled the pin in March.
I choose life whilst I’m still young enough to find one (58). It’s hard , but more peaceful.
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But I’m still involved. He doesn’t get it why. I’m am riddled with guilt.
He got sick, really sick. On the mend now. Been in hosp so no booze for a month.
I walk a fine line between sticking with saving my own life and sanity and being supportive.
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Keep moving forward. I will not let this disease or any of the problems that go with it suck the life and soul out of me. Sometimes I feel like it’s winning and it makes me mad. Mad enough to take charge. Today I will take charge and enjoy some part of this day!! Just made a coffee and I’m going for a drive. Renew my spirit and come back in a better frame. Sending extra love and strength to all my alcoholic spouse sisters. 💪🏼❤️
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